Do you consider yourself as having high-functioning anxiety? Do you need a few tips around your high-functioning anxiety from someone that understands? This post might be for you!

High-functioning anxiety might also be referred to as ‘hidden anxiety’ (although terminology can be used interchangeably and incorrectly depending on context).

It’s those of us that outwardly appear as ambitious, having ‘everything together’ or considered as being successful. However, internally, there may be ongoing background noise, negative dialog or worry.

High-functioning anxiety is also common among those of us that have been diagnosed with Generalised Anxiety Disorder (GAD), which involves persistent feelings of worry and nervousness.

I’m also very aware that symptoms of neurodiversity such as ADHD/ASD/auADHD may overlap here. Please bear this in mind if you suspect or have been diagnosed with any of these. This is well beyond the miniscule realms of me and this blog.

Moving on, the metaphor of the ‘floating duck syndrome’ comes to mind. Those of us with hidden anxiety very much appear calm and serene on the surface. Underneath the water, though, we’re frantically paddling to keep afloat.

As an analogy, it’s a bit crude and simplistic. Forbes has an article you can read the excerpt without payment here. I also found this opinion article published through The Stanford Daily around why the analogy needs to be modernised (although through an angled view of Stanford students, take that as you will).

As my research progressed around hidden anxiety, it has identified that this topic is very broad and involves a number of routes. Hidden anxiety is not a simple case of ‘do this and you’re fixed’.

Heck, mental health is never ‘do this and you’ll be fixed’. There’s usually a number of underlying ripples causing you to hide your anxiety.

Therefore, the angle of this post will be around:

• Quick and simple ideas to ease the short-term symptoms
• Possible gentle reminders that deeper root-causes need to be unpacked/explored
• Useful validated, checked links for further research you might want to do

As always, I’m not a clinical professional. I can’t diagnose you, nor should what I write be taken as the be-all-end-all. The thoughts shared here are from personal experience, in the hopes it helps just one person. I always welcome constructive feedback!

Let’s get stuck in…

It’s okay to feel anxious

A lot of the time, our brains are our own worst enemy. Feeling anxious is very normal, but it doesn’t feel like it at the time. I’ve written about the facts and fiction around anxiety here, where I explain about our hard-wired, subconscious reactions as a form of self-preservation.

I’ll say this until the cows come home – anxious feelings are okay. As mammals, without self-preservation, we wouldn’t have succeeded as a species.

I know – me telling you this right now probably won’t help, and I understand. But, the more someone tells you something, eventually you’ll start to believe it!

Your high-functioning anxiety (and general anxiety) is telling you that you need to show that you have it all figured out.

None of us have it figured out.

That’s the problem with anxiety and, more recently, a possible culmination of social media (more on that later).

Ultimately, what you need to remember is that:

• Your anxious feelings are just your brain protecting itself. If you didn’t feel anxiety, anxious in certain situations, empathy, and more, it may signify more serious personality disorders (which are much harder to remedy, if at all).
• You don’t need to feel one hundred percent okay today, or any day. Your perceived need to always succeed is telling you that.
• Consider that your high-functioning anxiety is a slight glitch – it can be rewired
• You don’t have to fix yourself instantaneously – no matter how much you will yourself to feel better. It’s not possible. Trust me, I’ve tried 😅

Recognising the signs

If you’ve found yourself on my little blog space on the web, no doubt you can already recognise some of your nuances, habits or thought processes around anxiety.

P. S – It takes a lot of self-reflection to get you here; give yourself a pat on the back for that.

If you’re here but you aren’t sure why, I’d highly recommend taking this fifteen minute questionnaire via the NHS to check your well-being status. As always, please do make sure you read all notes before taking it. There is also an NHS self assessment which leads to further advice and links that might be useful.

Unfortunately though – anxiety, and especially hidden anxiety, is a culmination of many causes.

But, being able the recognise your hidden anxiety can really help. The depth you delve can be a struggle, traumatising and something you may not want to address just yet.

That is totally okay. Know your limits.

However, here are some thoughts and questions to ponder over:

• Is your hidden anxiety because you’re a perfectionist?
• Do you feel anxiety because you don’t feel like you’re being productive?
• Is that productivity anxiety because you don’t feel like you’re being productive all of the time?
• Is it difficult for you to just be still and in that moment?
• Do you beat yourself up internally for feeling bored?
• Do you often overcommit, personally, professionally, emotionally, or all of them?
• Do you feel like you let people down when you’ve overcommitted?
• Do you tell yourself off when you overcommit?

As mentioned above, neurodiversity such as ADHD, ASD and auADHD significantly overlaps with anxiety disorders, or anxiety is as a result of neurodiversity. Please do take this into consideration here. 

The thoughts or feelings whilst reading the points may have triggered you to want to learn more. Here are some useful links I’d recommend perusing when you’re ready:

The Conditional Management Company: Managing High Functioning Anxiety with CBT: A Practical Guide to Taking Control

NHS Inform: Anxiety self-help guide

Psyche Clinic: High-Functioning Anxiety: Why Success Does Not Mean You Are Coping

I might add more at a later date.

Reframing unhelpful thoughts

High-functioning anxiety means we spend a whole heap of time in our brains, thinking about unhelpful thoughts. That’s not our fault, it’s natural to us.

Recently, I’ve also realised that my brain and it’s thoughts definitely aren’t normal; that’s an ADHD aspect I won’t address today.

What I can do though, is talk about reframing or countering anxious thoughts.

Here are some points worth thinking about:

Are you catastrophising?

Trying to excessively prepare for a situation that’ll never happen means you might be catastrophising. Although a natural response to danger means preparing for everything is completely natural, you may be excessively overthinking. Reframing your catastrophising might look like this:

• Is your genuine fear rational?
• What evidence do you have that confirms your perceived outcome?
• Will your fear result in real consequences?

These reflections may help you break out of your catastrophising thought process.

Are you ignoring the good signs and only focusing on the bad?

In modern life, this might be telling yourself you’ve failed at work, that you’re not competent, or your recent performance review made you feel useless.

For some of us, our anxiety creates negative thoughts and it’s hard to shake them. But, are you subconsciously focusing on the bad?

Can you acknowledge the good that you do right now? As hard as it might be to recognise this, you have and will continue to provide positive things to society.

Mindfulness techniques

I’ve written about mindfulness on this blog post previously: What is Burn Out? How to Recognise it – do have a read. Here, I share a few techniques around grounding and mindfulness, including the most common method: 5-4-3-2-1.

However, today, I’d like to write about a mindfulness idea that may help with your hidden anxiety. I hope you find them useful. Remember: mindfulness needs your whole attention, and may be difficult initially. Turning off your thoughts is hard work, so don’t berate yourself if you can’t focus straight away. It takes time and practice.

Simple stretching

Mindfulness-based stress reduction (MBSR) is a clinically recommended way to help people to cope with and improve physical symptoms caused by a range of illnesses. This could be both mental or physical. I discovered this through Guy’s and St. Thomas’ NHS Foundation trust website. I would highly recommend having a look.

Here, I’ve summarised a stretching technique you can try. You’ll probably need around ten minutes minimum, longer is totally okay too.

First, start by getting yourself into a comfortable position, either standing or sitting. This should be whilst you’re alone, or have time to spend on yourself. If you’re sitting, you just need space to be able to move your arms freely. Please don’t force yourself to move or stretch that your body isn’t able to – you know your own limits.

Now, slowly move your arms up horizontally, as much as you are able, outwardly. Eventually our arms will be vertical above your head. Take note of how your body feels right now.

Then, move your arms to the right, together. This may result in your body going with them, and maybe your hips, too. Take note of your body stretching and the sensations that you can feel.

Once done, do the same but to the left. At all times, remember to acknowledge what you can feel in your body. You’re going to be stretching muscles you may not have stretched for some time!

Then, slowly move your arms back down to your sides.

Now, put both hands on your hips with elbows out. Sit and rest in this position for as long as you want to.

Eventually, turn your upper body to the right. Keep your hips and feet in the same position, you only want your shoulders and arms to move to the right. It’ll cause some stretching, so take notice of that.

Don’t push anything, we don’t want you as a conked out in a mess on the floor!

Now, do the same but to the left. Turn your upper body to the left, causing stretching you’re comfortable doing.

Eventually, bring your arms back down to your waist, noting your breathing and how your body feels. You should find that your body and mind have been quite quiet, only focusing on these actions at the time.

Mindfulness is all about noticing your body and surroundings, but in a healthy way.

I’ve had to shorten this stretching technique, as otherwise I’d be here all night! Please do take a look at the full method here. There’s guided (and timed with time-stamped) video, as well as transcripts if this suits you better.

Here are some links on this topic you might want to peruse:

NHS – Breathing exercises for stress

NHS guided video: How to cope with anxiety – a relaxation technique

Links to explore

Bringing this subject to a close, I’d like to share a few further links you might want to have a look at. These links are relevant to all of my (somewhat rambling) tips and advice.

Here you go:

• NHS – CBT therapy
• NHS – Reframing negative thoughts
• Healthline – Stretch Therapy Should Be More Than an Afterthought — Here’s Why It’s Important
• ADHD UK – What is ADHD
• National Autistic Society –
  Understanding Autism – Autism Diagnosis Guide
• Psychiatry UK – The Overlap Between ADHD and Autism (AuDHD)

As always, I hope you’ve found this post useful, feedback or comments are always welcome.

Much love,

Jess xxx